Cleaning out the cobwebs

Greetings!

I took a Bachelor(ette) break, because let's be real...Des' season was so boring I couldn't get into it.  Because of that reason, I never felt the need to watch Juan Pablo's quest for love.  And because I knew nothing about JP's season, I never "met" Andi.  Heck, I don't even "have a connection with Chris" but something about Prince Farming made me think I should blog again!  Well, that and the fact that I have 2 supportive friends, and one friend who is so bored with the trashy selection of ladies and Chris' ability to swap spit with someone every 30 seconds, that this season was sure to be blogging gold!


I'm starting with whatever week this is.....the To Be Continued episode which begins with Kelsey experiencing a panic attack.  See ya tomorrow!

#2 Hollywood for All The Right Reasons

I'm still conflicted regarding my attention to Des' season of The Bachelorette.  However, since the only "current" show to watch today is The Voice, I figured since I'm already upset the obnoxious Swon Bros were saved, I'd  invite my current attitude to stay a little longer and critique the Bach'ette!
Are these boys all oblivious to time? Or did they just jump off of the S.S.Obvious???? We get it! You haven't had a date with Des yet.  In fact, up until 2 minutes and 47 seconds before Chris Harrison walked in, you didn't even realize the first date was so close.  19 of you want to be the 1st. 1 of you will be first. 14 of you will enjoy a group date. The only people allowed to complain about dates and not "having alone time with Des" would be those that were not selected for dates.

Date Details:

1 on 1: Hollywood Wedding on Bridge with a concert
Oh sweet Brooks.  As far as I'm concerned you and Des can keep the wedding wardrobe on and head to the nearest chapel...after proper marriage counseling, family/close friends meet & greet and at least 6 months living in your pre-ABC life!  Side note...did they dance on the same carpet square Emily & Ryan used? Well travelled.

Group: Soulja Boy
Apparently, SB has more than "Superman" in his repertoire....who knew?!
Competitor Chris....not to be confused with main man Chris Harrison. You may be captain of the SS Obvious. You're there to spend time with Des...1 date card has been revealed. 1 group date is being read. Calm down killer!

Dan: Adorable

Juan Pablo: Confusing...I don't understand him

Kasey: No opinion yet

Zak K: he's the guy from HS/college who really wanted to fit in with the football/lax team but it never worked...so he goes from lifting weights to the tanning bed to getting a massage.

Will: Annoyingly arrogant.  Really, what guy does hot yoga? Gross!

Brian: He just looks shifty.

Drew: Seems cute

James: Hate to say it but the tattletale man tears preview ruined it.

Mikey: Meat head

Zak W: Keep a shirt on and hand out sunglasses...your teeth are blinding.

Nick: Cute. No full opinion yet

Michael: Adorable! Seems fun!

Brandon: Seems ok but also emotionally intense

Ben: Also seems shifty but in a lazy way, not a sneaky way.

So Michael's line was kind of a dig at those who have gone before him.  Funny guy!

Poor Diogo....didn't get a First Night Rose and now Soulja Boy has his knight in shining armour costume!


OH MY GOODNESS...lyrics relating to Bachelors of the past.  Now that's fubby sruff!!

MOST AWKWARD rap EVER!

Somebody to love

Y'all, it's Memorial Day weekend and Des' journey to love begins Monday.  In true Bach/ette fashion, I'm sure Des' season will be "the best one yet" and truly "amazing" as well as a "dream come true" but for some reason I'm just not interested in watching.  As in not even slightly excited about it.

Sure, I watched the Bloopers episode the other night but even with the promos, I'm just not intrigued.  

Yes, Des seemed sweet. 

Yes, she'll have Sean flashbacks.  

Yes, drama will fill the air.

Yes, people will cry.

But for some reason I'm not interested.  I do still think Lesley M would've been a witty and amusing B'ette but she was smart to
graceful "complete" a season and be done.

Which leads me to wonder how 25-35 year olds are able to not work for almost an entire year. Think about it.  From a filming/production standpoint Sean left for Emily's season the beginning of March (1st 1 on 1 was March, 16, 2012....I was there!) and proposed to Catherine mid November 2012...that's 8 months. Add that to the promo schedule while the show airs, that's Jan-March....so an entire year.  Since Des was on the Bachelor and is now the B'ette, she's on the same "no work, all roses" schedule.

I can't help but think what my two male, both married, both have kids, bosses would say if I walked into their offices, sat down and exclaimed "Gentleman, I love my job, I love the company and I'm so grateful for the opportunity to learn from both of you.  However,  I'd like to pack up my office and embark on a quest for love.  I'll meet 25 suitors and represent God & myself well, so don't worry but seriously, I have an amazing 3 month journey to start." OR "My inability to date in this town has gotten the best of me so I'm going on national TV to compete with 24 other single girls for the heart of the same man. Tune in Monday nights."  Yea...NEVER going to happen.  While they are supportive I'm fairly certain they'd shake their heads, laugh, and respond with "You want to do what?".


If anyone from ABC ever stumbles upon this little ole blog, I'd like you to consider reformatting the show to be realistic.  Film in a hometown or fun city. Complete every day tasks. Travel to must see attractions in the area....weekend getaway type places.  How someone responds to everyday stuff...sitting in beach traffic, dealing with airports and TSA, random car issues, horrible service at a restaurant  and automated phone prompts instead of a real person talking really brings out ones true colors!  Add reality to your idea of "reality".   Perhaps the success rate of married couples would be higher if the extravagance wasn't the highlight but the "true connection" was the focus?!

#12 The Final Rose

Congratulations to Sean & Catherine!

While I think they are adorable and wish them nothing but the best, I can't help but point out the following:

Sean Lowe = S. Lowe (slow)

Catherine Lowe = C. Lowe (Cee Lo Green)

A marriage would make them musically slow:)

They did have a gorgeous proposal! That background and the colors chosen...well done interior decorator!

#11 He says, She says..and other amusing moments

Ok so does anyone else think that when Sean & Chris Harrison hang out they channel their inner frat boy.?  They are all "alright man, let's party!"  And now, visiting the sorority house is the icing on the cake! Sean's looks. New haircut Needs haircut  Hair has style Fresh shaven Not shaven Sun exposure Not enough sun Endless possibilities with what you'll see!   Gotta hand it to hair & makeup on this show...the divot in Tierra's forehead was gone. Women Intro Observations:Ashley. You were gone the 1st night gone because you were drunk and more interested in a necktie.  Why are you here?!?! Diana. Still looks bored Brooke. Don't remember you. Daniella. Looks great!  She was frumpy during filming but pulled it together for WTA. Jackie. Still think she's quiet yet sophisticated Kacie B. This is not your first WTA: control the hair! Leslie H Stunning.  Hasn't changed Kristy no change Taryn Doesn't look old Katie hasn't changed Amanda looks happy Selma gorgeous Robin looks mature Sarah looks so lively and happy!!! Des Just plain adorable! Always looks cute Lesley eh AshLee hair got some body and looks great!     Quotes of the night   Dang! Lesley had some amazing one liners! She invented "tierrarist" and called AshLee a "total control freak" "Ya gotta hide your crazy." -Selma re Tierra "Tierra's sparkle didn't sparkle that big and it never did the entire season." -Lesley   "When I walk into a room I bring this joy and smile and I'm happy." -Tierra **Yes, you could hear eyes roll when she said that!   "Not right or wrong, it's your way."-Chris Harrison to Tierra   "Why not make best friends but just be friendly? Just hang." -Chris Harrison to Tierra "I was very consistent throughout the season." -Tierra (yea consistently crazy!)   "I don't know you outside of the show. Is this normal? Are you normally misunderstood in life?" - Chris Harrison to Tierra   "You're disillusional." -Robyn to Tierra "I can't remember everything that happened." -Tierra ***Really....Tierra just doesn't get it. You want an example of things you did wrong? Honey you were filmed 24/7 for roughly 8 weeks.....ABC has plenty of examples!   "Tierra made her own bed, her own cot...what have you." -Lesley   "Who cares about my eyebrow?" -Tierra "America does!" -Chris Harrison   "Only on The Bachelor are you going to develop 3 relationships at one time and fall in love with 3 separate women." -Sean Lowe "I think about her and I smile." -Sean about Des General Observations:    Ashlee looks & sounds different   Tierras forehead has been altered. Des would make a great bachelorette!!! As would Lesley!    Brooke. Where'd she come from?! She was around for what....3 episodes. Girl, you don't get to talk about what you missed once voted off. Robyn. She would also make a great B'ette. Funny girl! Smart too! Even Chris Harrison doesn't like Tierra and he's supposed to like everyone! Were we supposed to see the stagehand give Tierra instructions and countdown? Dang to awkward SILENCE!!!! Not going to lie. Thought we'd catch Tierra looking for Sean instead of talking to Chris! If Tierra had a good heart and great character....she would've chosen to rise above, make the best of the situation or remove herself from it.   The first rose was not the target on Tierra's back. Kacie B had knowledge of how things work and was a surprise add on and she didn't have a target. Not only that, as Sean continued to hand out roses throughout the evening, Tierras rose lost its sparkle :)   I think Tierra bullied her fiance into proposing so she could flash a ring in front of everyone. Ok Brooke. You didn't last long but you called Tierra out! Well done! You're right, she didn't want to be friends with the girls and made that clear so she needs to stop playing the victim card. The connection between Sean and Tierra was always on the side of a medical emergency! AshLee is a feisty gal. Tierra just doesn't understand. Lesley. Again, always giving the delicately worded yet amazing answer! Oh Chris H. I adore your questions regarding the rock on Tierras finger.   I too would like to know why is getting engaged in January is a big secret? Tierras theme song should be: Don't be fooled by the rock that I got, I'm still Tierra and I slept on a cot   Looking back, Sean and Sara would be cute together...and I do think if they met at a dog park, they'd date but on a show with 26 other women it just wasn't right. Des. Goodness I loved the idea of Des & Sean!!!! seriously, the goodbye still breaks my heart. She's so eloquent. AshLee. Major style change. Blown out wavy ombre look. Entire face looks different. She even sounds different.  What gives?   Dude. AshLee is getting mean. Her responses are a prime example as to who Sean doesn't want to grow old with.  Girlfriend has some serious psycho in her highly organized life. Sean.  You are still so sweet....even when you walk in to a room full of tension and stares. Gotta give you props to commenting on AshLee's "beautiful" hair. Sean is honest, yet has the same feelings for multiple people. Why would he "come check on" AshLee....she left in silence....why check in? We all know AshLee has some control issue. And abandonment....which she hasn't said yet this episode!    Sean. You are a class act while AshLee drives the crazy train. Give it up girl! Why all the footage before "action"? "I think about her and I smile." -Sean about Des. Frankly, that sounds like someone to grow old with if ya ask me! However, even if it wasn't sincere, Des and Sean were so cordial in their wishes!   I would like to see a WTA with Catherine & Lindsay.  ATFR doesn't count because that is a different atmosphere.  Bloopers.  I'd also like to see more bloopers! If the Bachelor was real life....could you imagine gathering all the people you dated before you met "the one" rehashing the good, bad and ugly and ending with some variation of "finally found the best"?!?!

#10 Mai Thai, No Cry Bye

This is how tonight's post is going to go:

 

Topic.

Thoughts.

 

Let's join this journey of love Sean is on, shall we?

 

Thailand.Colorful.

Picturesque.

A place I'd like to visit.

Sean discovers sunglasses

 

I like how Sean brings the girls outside of their comfort zones. It's good team building.

 

Lindsay.

Have I mentioned lately how much I'm just not a Lindsay fan?
However, I would not eat bugs either...but we all know I'd have a granola bar and some almonds in my bag anyway so I wouldn't need to resort to nourishment from something that I'd step on or swat.
Loving the evening portion of the date.

Great scenery. It's like Christmas lights meets State Fair meets elegance and culture.

Lots of AWKWARD SILENCE!
And of course....Lindsay is saved from dropping the L bomb by traditional Thai dancers.

Fantasy.
I'm not convinced Sean likes Lindsay and I realize I miss Des. And Leslie.

AshLee.
She talks a lot. I mean I really wonder what is going through AshLee's head as she watches herself on the show with the rest of America.
I'd also like to know how many times AshLee has said "abandonment" this season.

Jimmy Kimmel has an "amazing" tally....anyone have an "abandonment" tally?
Does she not realize that caves don't come with maps?

They're kind of like life. Bright and dark, in and out, beautiful.
I wish the cave audio was better and really,I can understand her concern....I mean goats milk, ice swimming, building rappelling.....crazy dates!  Loch Ness monster is probably waiting in that dark water.
I will say the cave itself doesn't bother me.....it's what's living in the water that freaks me out.

Fantasy. 

Does AshLee's necklace say "gymnast"?

I'm sad their is a severe weather center warning scrolling across the screen and I can't read the feature tweets.

So I suppose AshLee saying she "doesn't take getting engaged lightly" must be a new motto for her Miss Married at 17.
Oh AshLee! Dropping the ring size and features....Girl, you CRAY!

Unless it is a family heirloom, I think the man should pick/design the ring!

Catherine.She wins the award for happiest to see Sean.
Is it just me, or has Sean only brushed the hair out of Cathrine's eyes? Nice!
I like that Sean seems to be the only lead to think about life after the cameras. He knows real life is coming soon.
I also think he only pulled out Catherine's chair. Lindsay & AshLee sat themselves.
Catherine really is half goofy half serious...not really a middle ground.

Fantasy.
I like how Catherine speaks to Sean's character, not his looks.

In 50 years, you won't have all the muscles but you'll still have a great sense of humor and the ability to communicate.

Before the rose ceremony.
I just realized I participated in Emily & Ryan's 1 on 1 (first of season) which was March 16, 2012. That means Sean was sent home end of May maybe.....and his season ended November 16, 2012? Homeboy had "27 girlfriends" in 8 months. Dang!
However, just like Brad....Sean dodged a bullet with Emily. She seems sweet but I personally think she changed herself too much to appeal to Hollywood....but I don't know the gal so hopefully I'm incorrect.

Back to Sean!

Movie messages
Can we please give the man a chair?

Maybe some popcorn?

He seems happiest with Lindsay's message.
Crazy emotional over Catherine's message.
And fed up w abandonment repetition from AshLee's message. Nail in the emotional coffin.

Rose Ceremony.

AshLee. Your boobies are crazy. Modesty woman! 

I think AshLee's necklace covers more area than the fabric for her boobs.

I do like the necklace.

I expected tears like raindrops from AshLee when Catherine's name was called.  As in an all out sob fest.

Des' goodbye reaction was heartbreaking. AshLee's is just harsh.

This gal is freaking stone cold. I'm shocked she hasn't broken down!

Though I am getting the Tierra psycho vibe from AshLee now.

Mystery Proposal LetterIt's gonna be from Mama Lowe! I'm thinking it goes a little something like this:

 

Sean,

We love you, support you and know you'll make the right decision.

God brought you here and He'll continue to guide your steps.  

We know God has picked an amazing wife for you and we believe it is Catherine.

Regardless of who you pick, thank you for this awesome trip to Thailand and for not making your family eat bugs or swim thorough a dark cave.

Love Always,

Mom

 SO VERY PUMPED FOR WOMEN TELL ALL!!!

#9 Sean Says...

Sean answered a few questions and posed a few more.  But really, the only thing we need to remember is this fine quote from the Bachelor himself:

 

 

"Tierra never should have come on this show. She's not suited for this show. She doesn't know how to handle herself in this environment."

Neither does her eyebrow, Sean...neither does her eyebrow.


Also, how amazing was this picture of the Tierrabear???

check out those chompers